I think a lot of people really overlook the positive side of zombies. I threw together some reasons why zombies need love too. BTW- this is what happens when I should be editing. Sigh.
- They never talk back to you. You can pretty much say anything to them and their response will be, “Ahh-Mhh-brains.”
- For the most part, they’re slow runners. You’re never feel more in shape then running against one of them
- They are easy to maintain and feed. Their diets are pretty obvious. Don’t have to worry about any food allergies.
- You will always look HOT standing next to one of them.
- They could be used for some manual labor jobs that typically don’t involve the public and no living creature would want to do.
- They won’t be a strain on our healthcare costs or social security
- We could tax them however
Anyway, please add more reasons why zombies need love too.
Tsk, tsk, Jennifer. Some people consider "zombie" to be a derogatory term. Please use Undead American (or Undead Canadian, Undead Belgian, etc.). "Cerebratarians" also is considered acceptable.
ReplyDeleteAs for the love, most Undead Americans are pretty straightforward about what they want in a relationship (i.e., brains). I really like that they don't play petty mind-games.
Mental picture for you: The Scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz as a zomb--, uh, I mean, Undead American.
Now I'm coming up with alternate lyrics to his song when _I_ should be editing!
HAHAH! Best Zombie post EVER
ReplyDelete"I really like that they don't play petty mind-games." hahahahahaha
ReplyDeleteLOL. I don't think I can come up with anything as good as what's on your list. But..hmm. They're pretty low maintance. No, "What's for supper?" "Will you rub my back?" "When're you going to wear that sexy little number for me again?" "Why are you always spending time with the baby; when is it going to be MY time again?" Hmm. Maybe I should get a zombie.
ReplyDeleteah, I wonder whether you would give zombie a hug :))
ReplyDeleteI so totally would.
ReplyDelete